When Everything You Do Feels Really Small...





I am a part of a discipleship group. We meet about once a week. There are 11 of us (5 couples and one young man whose love is away at school). A few weeks ago we talked about ways we can make disciples. We talked about intentional conversations and when and where to have them. We all took a one week challenge to try to have at least one of these conversations (you know, like the grocery clerk tells you her son is sick and you take the opportunity to insert Jesus into that conversation and pray with her.)

I didn’t have a single one of those conversations that week.

And I began to feel guilty. You’re going to do this series called crazy obedience and you can’t have one conversation about Jesus, Amanda?!


Can I just say this? It seems really hard to be a crazy-obedient, disciple-making, Jesus-follower when you are a stay-at-home mom in the thick of cheerios, don’t talk with your mouth full, please don’t climb the bookshelf son, yes I will take you to the park, dishes, dinner, and bedtime… the part of motherhood that is so full of joy and kisses but also full of busy-at-home work.

So before hurdling myself headfirst into the throws of you’re-not-good-enough, you’ll-never-get-it-right… I made a list. I began thinking of every intentional and obedient thing I had done that week, no matter how small it might have looked. 

  • When my kids and I drove by a home with an ambulance and we saw a stretcher going into the home, we prayed out loud for that family and the EMT’s.
  • I sat and listened instead of rushing off when someone clearly needed to share their troubles...even though I was already late.
  • I took a coffee to a friend and we spent time fellowshipping and encouraging each other.
  • I took my kids on a few walks to the park. One time, we invited a new friend to join.
  • I extended grace and spoke kindly to a slow grocer clearly having a rough day.
  • I asked my husband for a few hours away so I could spend time with God.
  • I made sure I text a reminder to a girl who had reached out to me and wanted to go to church.
  • I scheduled help in the preschool class at church even though it was my week because I just really needed to be in service.
  • I asked two teenage girls to sit by me at church.
  • I looked people in the eyes and smiled at them when I was about my weekly errands.
  • I brought my husband into my struggles and decisions. I allowed him to be the head of this family.

Let’s not compare lists, my gifts are different than yours, my life, my call… but do you see it? Little things done with intention.  Little things that could become big things… if God wills it.

Crazy obedience isn’t just Abraham’s moment, “Get you to a land that I will show you…” It was the daily walking it out too, the little steps in his journey. When we tell God, “Anything,” I can just about guarantee that at some point you will have a big moment, a moment that will terrify you, that won’t make much sense, a moment where you fully need God to show up because whatever it is is far too big for just you… and then there are the little daily moments. Moments that might feel insignificant,  but moments where you have the chance to practiceobedience. 

{I do believe obedience is a practice.}

Each one of those little moments with your kids help grow them into a disciple and future disciple maker.
Each one of those little conversations with the people in the grocery line has the potential for God to enter it and alter you both.
Each one of those enjoyable conversations with a friend encourages and fills you both up.

Crazy obedience is living with your life open to God, living each moment as though God could show up... and, really, He is here with me, with you. And God doesn't look at the size of the obedience... He looks at the heart. It isn't about having something to prove that you really are a follower of Christ, it's about walking in-step with Christ and trusting Him each step of the journey. Sometimes the craziest thing you can do is know that God wants you and is proud of you even when you feel like everything you do is so small. (Remember grace isn't earned.) Little acts of obedience done with God grow into big things.

“Do not despise these small beginnings, for the Lord rejoices to see the work begin…” Zechariah 4:10



Do you ever feel insignificant or like you just do a small thing? Have you read some of this series and wondered if you could ever really be “crazy obedient?” Maybe consider writing your own list of everything you do with intention this week?



By Grace,
Amanda


Click the graphic to see all the posts in this series.