So I Married a Cop

I had once upon a time written down professions I did not want to marry into. I have to admit I was one of those girls who had a sheet of paper (okay, it was probably a good five pages long) of qualities I wanted in my future husband. I had a subsection for what I was not looking for. Amongst two other professions, I had scribbled the word COP.

It wasn’t that I didn’t value the profession. I just didn’t want all the struggles that I imagined went with the job. I knew it would be difficult. (Also, I was like 17, so give me a break).

Guess what?

I’m married to a cop.

I joke and say God tricked me because cop was nowhere on Mike’s radar when we got married.

Thing is, I had always thought I would marry a pastor.

When Mike and I first started seeing each other, I have journal pages full of my questions for God. God, he’s not a pastor. God, he doesn’t look anything like I thought he would. God, it’s Michael. Are you sure? Before the thought was even fully formed, I could hear the quiet voice of God, “Shhh. Trust me, Amanda.”

I did. And I fell in love. Madly. Deeply. Truly.

Truth be told, I thought God telling me to trust Him meant that He was going to change Mike, that Mike would have some kind of God-encounter and decide to go into full-time vocational ministry.

Through our times of lean finances, Mike did encounter God. And God faithfully led him into law enforcement.

I am not so sure God actually changed him though. Refined him, sure. Completely changed his gifts and talents, no.

But God did change me. He changed the way I see.

Because from where I stand, on the arm of cop, I see a broken world. A world of prostitutes, meth addicts, mentally unstable, repeat DUI offenders, dysfunctional families, broken marriages, abusers and the abused, teenagers making stupid decisions. My husband works in a world where he’s called horrible names, where threats are made against his life simply because of the badge he wears, where he has to be alert and ready at all times. I see men (and women) whose every day is everyone else’s worst day, bearers of bad news, the first to hear the wails of a momma who’s lost her son, who witness the crumbled heap of man who’s lost his wife.

Cops are on the front lines.

Photo Credit

I have discovered that I am, in fact, married to a full-time vocational minister. Because in the midst of unspeakable tragedy, I can’t imagine there being a better person to have to pick up and carry someone’s devastation. Someone who could be more gentle. Someone who could be strong enough to not crumble under the weight of it. In the midst of the hopelessness and bad decisions, I can’t imagine a better cop car to be in the back of than the one my husband is driving. Someone who bears both Truth and Hope. In the midst of a fallen world, I can’t imagine a better person to carry the ministry of justice. Humble. Respectful. Strong.

(I am just a little proud of my husband.)

So I am thinking perhaps next time you are in are in the Chipotle lunch line and the cops walk in, tell them thank you (because like seriously… is it just me or is the Chipotle burrito the new donut?! HAHA) Maybe think of what cops face and pray for their lives, their families and their souls?

(Anybody else now have the Cops theme song in your head??  “bad boys, bad boys, whatcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do when they come for you…” If not, your welcome.)

I’m wondering how you view cops… in a positive or negative light?

I’d also love to know if anyone else that reads here has a LEO in your family? Let me know in the comments.

By Grace,

Amanda Conquers

I may be writing a little more on this subject. I don’t want to write for cop’s wives because like seriously, rookie here. That’s like getting parenting advice from the first-time pregnant girl whose read all the books; just stop. But I do want to write about the journey. Because truly, I am learning a lot here about things like prayer, spiritual warfare, and how to keep growing in love in your marriage when you are changing… and just simple things like what it’s like to be married to a cop.